Becomedating smart com
I realised I need to show these standards through my actions rather than just have them clear in my mind.Maria started coaching me soon after I went through a very difficult divorce.As someone who considers himself smart and direct, take it from me — there’s nothing wrong with these qualities. I think it’s not that these smart, successful women are exactly those things either, but they are perceived that way by some – not all – of the men they come in contact with.But if it also coincides with being difficult, dating might be a long, tough road for you. The trick to that is knowing how the man you’re with is perceiving you, and being able to tone down or turn off the traits he might find as reason to dump you for someone more agreeable.I had lost all faith in relationships and men but with Maria’s listening and motivating skills, I started to work through the barriers that kept me from believing and trusting in relationships again.As a result, I am now dating and really enjoying the process.So when I hear a woman talk about how “direct” she is, the first thing I think is: “She’s tactless.” I wrote about this in an article for entitled “Are You Honest… ” Self-proclaimed “direct” people often tell their dates what they think about them even if the date didn’t ask.They often try to change partners who have no desire to be changed. 😉See, there’s a price to pay for “being ourselves.” And if you’re going to express your opinion, you can’t be surprised if other people disagree with you. Maureen Dowd, the Pulitzer Prize winning columnist for the New York Times, wrote an entire book about this, called “Are Men Necessary? One of her main observations is that if an amazing woman like her could be single, there must be something wrong with men.
But what I realized is there’s a reason they call this the dating “game” and if you want to play, you have to learn the rules.Maria helped me to keep my faith and trust in the procedure all throughout the dating process.The dating world is a whole new world to me as I hadn’t dated in years and soon realised how much the dating world had changed.When the partner pulls away because he doesn’t want to be with someone so critical, the “direct” person concludes that he couldn’t appreciate her “honesty.”If this makes you feel personally indicted, welcome to the club. I write things that are, to say the least, provocative…and yet I always get surprised when I receive angry emails from readers. And if you’re trying to win each argument, you can’t be too shocked if he wants a woman who can be a little more acquiescent. What she doesn’t acknowledge is that despite her impressive credentials — attractive, successful, intelligent — she might not be giving men what THEY WANT. Just someone who makes his life EASIER and more pleasant. You are a go-getter and worthy of everyone’s respect. And with a generation of women who pose questions like “Are Men Necessary?When a man goes out with a woman, he’s not as concerned with whether she’s articulate and on track to make partner at the law firm. Listen, I’ve spent my life chasing after women I’ve intellectually admired. They’re not wrong for seeing things I could change. But if that go-getter side ends up emasculating your man, or makes him feel insignificant, or second-guessed, he’s not really getting what he wants out of a partner. ” it’s pretty difficult for us to enjoy our role as men.