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She's not trying to compete with you for his attention.Actually, you're probably last in the line of her competition. So please don't expect her to be wants to impress you. Try to remember that feeling and make things easier on her by giving her a chance.As parents we try hard to make sense of what motivates our offspring, to see things from their perspective.Perhaps we do this more readily because we have been where they are now, but they have not been - and won't be for many years, where we are!"After a long and fruitful discussion about we, his parents, needing to remain part of his life, we eventually accepted that we would not be seeing so much of him.
Sometimes it is just too hard for a young person to 'walk a mile in our shoes'.
It sounds as though you, Sue, have been able in the past to talk very openly with him, and this is a very important foundation to have.
Used gently and sparingly, it is always the strong point of family relationships. Your son has a life that is separate from the family now.
Sue, not her real name, has written to tell me of her problems with her son and his long-term girlfriend.
It is a reminder of how far we have to travel emotionally in our adult lives.